When Ayushman posed a question to Lord Buddha about the reason why there was sorrow in the world, Lord Buddha explained this by using the example of an old woman.
“An old woman called Gautami came to me in the throes of grief and said, ‘O Lord! My only son has died, please bring him back to life.’ I replied, “Yes, I can certainly alleviate your sorrow on the condition that you bring me those things which I will require to make this possible. I will purify them by chanting some mantras and then your son will come back to life.” Gautami thought that was easy enough and she got up to go. I stopped her and said, “Listen, I will need some mustard from such a house which has never had any cause for grief or mourning. Such a home where neither sorrow nor death have ever entered.”
Poor Gautami went from house to house through the whole town. Someone said that only last year they lost their son. Another person said, ‘Sister, take as much mustard as you wish, but my husband passed away recently.’ She was unable to find a single house that had never experienced sorrow or grief. She returned to me in the same state of grief. I reassured her and said, “Mother, there isn’t a single home in this world which has not been touched by death. Sickness, sorrow and death are the lot of mankind. There has never been an age in the world when people have not experienced sorrow.”
Why does man experience sorrow? If man is attached to the objects of the world and desires to possess them, he experiences sorrow when such objects are not within his reach. If he has no attachment for such objects, he will not experience sorrow if they are unavailable to him. We read in the newspapers about the demise of many people. Do we feel any sorrow about it? No. Why don’t we shed tears of grief? Because we are not attached to them. But bear in mind that a soft-hearted person will surely weep at the grief of others. His heart becomes overcome with compassion and sympathy. If we direct the same love, infatuation and attachment which makes us sorrowful towards the entire world, our sorrow will simply vanish. There is a feeling of sacrifice involved in this. Of course, this does not imply that one has to abandon one’s home and run away. However, expressing one’s compassion equally towards all is the meaning of the word ‘sacrifice.’ Our sages and saints have spoken to us several times about such sacrifice.
If dispassion gives rise to an effort to break out of social ties, there is nothing wrong about it. Nevertheless, from a perspective of mundane morality dispassion is often blamed for weakening society. If dispassion has made society weak, has indulgence and desire made it strong? The credit for whatever little we see of dharma, humaneness etc., in our country today goes to such dispassion. Look at the present state of the ancient civilizations of Greece and Rome. There are only a mere handful of people left. Where did all the glory of those civilizations vanish to? Look at the Indian civilization today. The glory of Indian culture is kept intact by its culture of sacrifice and renunciation.
Sacrifice whatever merits being renounced. Renounce bad habits, negative thoughts, harmful actions. Adopt good ideas, uplifting thoughts and positive behaviour. This is the reason why god is asked the question as to why mankind faces sorrow, the answer that is received is – attachment.
Our social conditions are such that we get caught in the net of sorrows. However, it is our duty to free ourselves from this strife. The duty, compassion, attachment and love which is limited to only our family, why don’t we share that joy with others? Everyone who lives in the world must understand this fact very clearly that there is no relief from troubles. Tell me, how many sorrowful situations have you been freed from? The creation of sorrows will carry on. While one person manages to struggle through the tides of sorrow and find a path out of it, another person drowns in the whirlpool of sorrow and is destroyed. The history of difficulties and sorrow is the history of victory as well. It is only after bearing the trials and tribulations that one chooses to walk the path of spirituality. When we live a life of spirituality, we free ourselves form the vortex of sorrows.
Yo vai bhooma tatsukham nalpe sukhamasti, the infinite is bliss. There is no bliss in anything finite. This is what is said in the Chhandogya Upanishad. Today there is a beautiful fragrance in the rose flower, but what will happen tomorrow? Will the flower have the same fragrance as it has today? No, it is perishable. We seek such happiness that is eternal. One may have grand palaces and vast kingdoms, but of what use is all that if one does not find happiness? As long as happiness is dependent upon any object, it is only momentary. Once Amrapali asked her son, Bal Shraman, ‘Son, will you stay with me? You will be happy, you will grow up; then I will get you married, then this will happen and that will happen.’ Her son kept on asking her, ‘And after that? And after that?’ In the end, she was unable to answer him. Then her son said, ‘In the end, sickness and death will come. I wish to have happiness that is eternal.’ That rendered her speechless.
Where does one find happiness? A child loves toys and sweets, when he becomes a youth he likes gold, fame and girls, in adulthood he loves his children and in old age he wishes to become a youth again. When death knocks on the door, he pines for life. Is there any end to the chain of desires? Whoever experiences desire should try to understand this truth uttered by Shankaracharya in his Shivaparadha Kshamapana Stotram:
Ayurnashyati pasyataam pratidinam yaati kshayam yauvanam
Pratyaayaanti gataha punarna divasaa kaalo jagadbhakshakaha;
Lakshmistoyatarangabhangachapala vidyucchalam jeevitam
Tasmanmaa sharanaagatam sharanad tvam raksh rakshadhuna.
One must see that the remaining life-span diminishes with the passage of each day and so decays youthfulness; also the days that are gone do not return, time devours the world. Wealth is fickle as the waves on water and life is as transient as lightning. Therefore, You, who give refuge to all, protect me, I seek your refuge. Protect me now!
The source of sorrow in life is desire and the source of joy is sacrifice.
There is a story about the Pandavas. When they were going into the forest, they felt very thirsty and set off in search of water. They found a lake but before they could drink the water they had to answer the questions put to them by the yaksha¸ a tree spirit. Nakul, Sahadeva, Bhima and Arjuna went to the lake; but they did not return. Then Dharmaraj went there. The yaksha told Dharmaraj that before he could drink the water, he had to answer the yaksha’s questions. The first question was, ‘What is the most surprising fact in this world?’ Everyday thousands of people die and yet man wishes to be immortal. This is the most surprising fact.
Even a frog caught in the mouth of a snake makes an attempt to catch a fly.
Similarly, a lot of our friends build grand monuments which are reduced to dust in a matter of moments due to an earthquake or some other disaster. Then they fret and grieve over it. This is why we are told that whatever we have received from the divine should be utilized with an attitude of non-attachment. ‘Bahujanahitaya, bahujanasukhaya, idam shariram’ – My body is dedicated towards the happiness and welfare of many. It is this attitude that must be cultivated and this is also the reason why yogis take care of their physical bodies.
When Sri Rama saw grief-stricken Tara after Vali’s death, he asked her, ‘Why are you afflicted with this grief? It is only the body before you which is lying asleep while the spirit is eternal; then why are you crying?’ What we need to learn from this is that death is inevitable for everyone. Therefore, grieving is of no use. We will only be able to free ourselves from the sorrows we face in life when we stop exploiting others in the search for our own happiness and to indulge our selfish ends; we should drop deceitful and hypocritical behaviour and adopt a straightforward, simple life.
Today, though we behave badly ourselves, we still speak about spirituality. Our sins will not be washes away by mere idle talk. On one hand there is deceit and crookedness and on the other hand we talk of spiritual life. No matter how much water you pour into a broken mud vessel, you will never be able to fill it. We also have a similar behaviour in relation to spirituality. We like to believe that we will redeem ourselves by performing ‘good deeds’, but that does not purify our negativities. One will have to face the consequences of our incorrect actions. In that case, why don’t we try and stay far away from such behaviour?
Today we are listening to a sermon and we have been listening like this for a long time, however it is only that person who takes it in through the ears and inscribes it in his heart who is truly a listener of a high calibre. This has been beautifully explained in Sri Swami Sivanandaji’s book, The Secret of Success in Life, through the story, ‘A Tale of Three Skulls.’
One day, a demon brought three skulls to the court of King Vikramaditya and started to say, ‘O King! Ask the learned pandits of your court to identify the most beautiful and perfect one from these three skulls. This should be accomplished within a week or else I will have to kill someone.’
King Vikramaditya accepted the challenge and explained it to the pandits. A pandit by the name of Rajaram assured everyone present that he would definitely be able to identify the best skull. On the seventh day, when the demon presented himself in the court, Rajaram said, ‘If an iron rod enters one ear and comes out of the other, that skull is the worst one. If the iron rod does not come out of the other ear but exits from the mouth, that skull is a mediocre one. However, the skull in which the iron rod enters through one ear and reaches the heart is the best one of the three.’
This implies that only a person who applies and lives what he has heard is the best listener. We will all have to learn to translate our learning into practical behaviour in our lives because actions are like seeds. All our actions are like seeds which sprout at the appropriate time and give us fruits accordingly.
To become complete human beings is very difficult and until such time the cycle of actions and being affected by their fruit will carry on. As long as we are caught in this cycle, we will continue to be beset by difficulties and face challenges. We should lovingly welcome challenges, because it is only through these challenges that we will be able to cleanse the negativities and flaws of our mind. Those people who have faced difficulties in their lives eventually embark upon the path of spirituality and sattwa.
It is only when we face difficulties in life that the qualities of bravery, courage, tolerance and patience have any relevance and importance. The greatness of life is to forge on ahead while bearing the challenges and difficulties on our path. Even difficulties have their limits. Regardless of how many troubles we face in life, those experiences should open our eyes. What is the use if we are going to let ourselves be blinded by difficulties?
If we wish to gain any learning from difficulties, we will have to learn to recognize the true though subtle form of objects and situations, and we will have to make the effort to understand the secrets within. Our entire perspective towards life has to undergo a profound and complete change. The first step towards this change is having courage, sacrificing selfishness and adopting the right conduct. Come forward to assist those who are suffering and troubled so that they may be relieved of their sorrows. Don’t think that I am suffering myself, so how can I solve other people’s problems? Bringing hope and joy to others will also make you happy. If we embrace challenges joyfully will they ever have the power to turn into tribulations and stop the rising tide of our success in life? Difficulties can neither cause us any harm nor can they blind us. Rather, they become like a balm to our eyes.
The beauty and joy in life comes from challenges and problems. Who would realize the importance or value of happiness and joy without experiencing sorrow or trouble? Can virtues like courage, bravery, tolerance and fortitude emerge in the absence of difficulties? For those who endlessly fret over difficulties, life is like a curse; for those who helplessly bear troubles, life is a burden; life is a battleground for those who bravely face it; whereas life is a boon for those who accept both troubles and joy in the same spirit.
This spiritual message from Sri Swami Sivanandaji was given by Sri Swami Satyananda Saraswati during a satsang at a public program in Lala-Tutwadi, Patan, North Gujarat. Reported by Shri Rasikbhai Suthar.